"Hello, my name is Victoria . I fall in love 5 times per hour and it rather disabling in everyday life. "
" Hello Victoria
**
me, when I younger, I thought the Love was going to fall over , like that, when I least expected it, story to me full of cum . Like a pigeon poop in midair, in fact.
then I would have ruined in Hollywood chewing gum to believe that no no, girls stinks no mouth ... even when it comes from eating garlic and herbs Soignon ... while ago, I barely have time to open my mouth pillow has already died.
I wheeled my big shovels chérichou story we can share openly our love and our colonies of microbes ...
would have been the big fun, eh?
Unfortunately at that age, I'm in fashion
"I expect it not juuuuuure jte! "
Bah nan ... Nothing. Cupid had deserted, leaving me ravaged heart.
And then one day I grown. Spiritually, I mean.
And today I finally realized that boys and me it was not possible (girls and me, either, whether we agree).
**
Take for example my laboratory assistant population
It therefore identifies:
... Chinese. (As the name suggests), They swarm like ticks in swamps. What at first glance, therefore leaves me a choice. Grave mistake!
For (damage) , I am not for inbreeding , me ... That is clear, it is not a history of jaundice or latent kiki rikiki.
... Ray. His hobby in life is the dung Cow , Point-to-the-line. but I do not judge based on this principle, it was preferable that remains colleague.
And frankly, if he has the same tastes of his parents crapper, our son was called out for Prostate ... Okay, that's original, but no thank you.
... The Indian. Despite the fact that eaten with the fingers , he ingeniously attracted my attention by her look type-I-am-the-chicken-that-was-very-want-of-its-d'arroser-special-sauce-Tikka-Masala ... . Bah nan yeah but what.
Colum ... I. It is Roux . Unacceptable feature: recalibrated capillary failure. Foliloc out of my body! In any case, it will not enter ...
... the Pakistanis. It is flaccid brain . Because the information comes from falling: the sect of (Indos-) Pakistani (-Sri Lanka) wanted my death by wear. So, they gave the word for me rotten life. "Oh, where is Cambodia? Is it it China? You really look like a Chinese ". Oh-my-god! Episode from the airport, The Revival! And you got yourself an ass's head removed from the mold too soon but j'te not say shit!
And finally,
... Colum II. One day, Colum He asked me to wear gloves, because he had not understood that the yellow- visible pee on my hands does not come naturally of my skin but gloves that I de-ja strung. An observation: us, ca would definitely not be possible. Maybe that would have been average to average if the Beatles had sung
"All You Need Is Glove ..." ...
pTet well yeah.
(Nan but frankly, if one day I turn in this color,
Tell me what ... )
**
To return to my chaotic love life ...
Sometimes I wonder s érieusement if I'm not a proctologist little in the soul ...
Before undertaking any community life, it is recommended know who and what you'll have to do.
This guidebook identifies key trouble may be encountered if you live in the 134 Park ... Horrible
You will be welcome at my
The sofa is a great mischievous as he was ousted of its function Main the day some have crippled the posterior above, because they did not the couch actually is not a trampoline butt.
So, observation is in order in foreign territory.
You see, as well as curtains colorful and very very ugly (even for a remarkable phenomenon carpet a blue and a risky coverage green fluorescent) can embellish the beauty of your living room ... then you've NEVER been very fond of this kind of scene picassesque. Thou shalt thank Thibaut still decorated the wall for a map of Gaul-way. Thank you Theo!
Moreover, it is possible that the view of the presence of clothespins son clinging to power remains all your life, a enigma.
Also, it is possible that you realize that windowsill Champion is all categories of the culture of dead flies died since 1995.
And in time, TV still walking (you'll be doing just go look for violence with your roommate's chain Algerian non-subtitled ).
Now you got two beautiful TVs , but their use is similar to Santa Claus to gloves and blue plaid pants : the sublimation landscape.
However, what makes the originality this place of life, is without a doubt ... the very troubling presence of a ... giant Teddy Bear.
Of Recent archaeological studies have attempted to assess the existence and / or quantity of microbes carried by the bibendum ... And voices were often raised to proclaim a backup of this species in the trash ... But nothing helped.
Note: in bed resting on the only chair in the house that overlooks the front door, it would be good for you that you're not a Tiny Asian trend psychotic returning alone at home, on a dark night ...
"I Aaaahh regaaaaarde, I know! He looks at me! "
missing is the music of the ice cream truck, and that's good, you're gone to defecate in your pants ...
Where is Brian? Brian Is In The Kitchen
Here, no need measuring cup, from cake pans, of scissors , of can opener, clean rags to of bowls, of stoves, or other fantasies so.
To help you task stove, chopping boards were precut ... and vegetable peeler is reduced to its simplest ilk: the part peeler. This is not a brake, especially when we know that the vegetable peeler comes easily fruit peeler In peeler or cheese still peeler bloody hand.
Détrompe yourself, you can also play interesting games in the kitchen, as attend passive construction interesting dishes piled , or date the number of weeks from which the food is now rotting under your nose.
So that one day you experienced the miracle of life applied to a glass of juice piss ... Yes, the roommate s enlarges : Radoudou after the parasite, bacteria hello friends.
At these natural biological phenomena , supplemented by physical phenomena on natural-:
" Consider a bar AB, A and B abscissa abscissa x1 x2. We note f (x) the linear density of effort exerted on the bar, F1 and F2 the forces exerted on the ends and g (x) the amount of linear acceleration.
By applying the principle of virtual power, find the local equations of motion and boundary conditions .
It thus happens that calculations wireworms very daunting to unsuspected major laxative effect can find application in everyday life *.
In view of the state chairs: from two things one, either the former roommate has not understood that the principle of a chair is not the same as a skipping rope . Let Chernobyl exited his buttocks. I do not see any other solutions.
However, if a perfect balance seems to reign in the kitchen, ceiling is a parameter that does not inspire you confidence ... because without warning, he can fall on you. As things have been well thought out, you will notice that it (always) piping for toilets which mouru ... And to feel the smell, you there are not far either.
* Unfortunately these facts are rare. Most teachers of physical u / Special are ravaged brain that make you consider things too improbable. Kind, they take a pendulum to which they make the misery go ahead and you do oscillate in a vertical plane XY, and c'mon you fucks him in a truck rectilinear uniform motion accelerated (but WHY would you do it?)
While you, you say that something is "Putaiiiin, but will make yoyo and shut up! "
You wash it, you wash it, you rinsed, you rinse:
Uhm, it smells Like a flower
The dryer is a little shit disturber ptit the kitchen ... even if you always not understand why it perched on a rickety stand at 1m height.
is the ptit chieur , because during your period of survival, you will have leisure to observe that a recurrent mania from some of your roommate to rely on is ... to initiate "machine washing + dryer" ... from the moment they are sure you sleep deeply ... You know, it's so existential having underwear dry 3h 36mn 40 s ... (BUT DO LIKE ALL THE WORLD, HAS HAIR MEEERDE SOR!).
In general, you're one wish, it to make them eat their calebuttes dirty, but hey you hold back ... because tomorrow ...
You've already decided that you'll have a frenetic need to move any your wardrobe 7h 33mn 13s.
Thy spirit of rebellion is on! ahah
Where is Jenny The Sister of Brian?
Jenny Is In The Bathroom
The shower is a good time that occurs most often after dinner, after sport, or for some isolated cases, NEVER ( by loss of time or passion for the stench ).
In addition, it allows you to test what a free immolation making you burn all the body parts, only the fourth degree.
Thus you will know the unspeakable joy of seeing beautiful bud pustules on your angelic face .
Sometimes, in the nooks of the shower, you find hair that the professionals play freedivers ... (or maybe it was the hair ...?)
Likewise, you'll find frequently and at random of trails whitish (for your mental health, we will consider that it may be that remnants of the shower gel ...).
Tinky Winky Dipsy ... ... ... Poo Poo
course, the reason " ; son + barbed razor blades " of the toilet bowl you cools and gives you a vague impression of you redo the fleece three times a day.
But major advantage: as you fear for your ass , you force yourself to levitate over your bowl.
And it does super balèze strain on his legs. (For cons, depending on the commission you're laying eggs, just a tip: is well ; AC spare you the worry of splashing poorly controlled).
While you're not quite serene when you go to the loo, however, there are others s they are pleased improvisational artists morning in-the-way-d'en-cum-the-most-dégueulassement-possible-in-the-bowl-of-toilet.
Without flushing, of course!
qu'ya Because of their ecological soul who resurfaced at 4am * Because yes, you, at 8am, before enjoying your lil breakfast, damn you're interested to see their gastroenteritis or moussaka gone wrong ... Normal.
By cons, if the same thing happens to you, before doing anything, (artistic or otherwise) , do not forget to check there is enough paper ass ... In times of shits is very nerd ...
And frankly same shit, so to speak.
To this end, avoid letting your trainer towels. Otherwise, when you go to the bathroom, they are subject, (it is ex- prèèèèès) a current sweeping shot of any part of a thing that whips really bad.
In all cases, is useful to remember that you should never neglect the existence of b to nag crapper ... OK, it ' is safe, there is more funky in life.
Especially when it is to strip the neighbor's shit ...
Well yes, it may well be the shit, your shit is still pretty darn best!
But hey, if it makes you save sight ...
* The flush toilet Elsewhere Landes have specificity to drain all the water resources of an entire village in Africa. There are also unidentified noises of animals slaughtered for 112 minutes ...
Good night kids!
Also note, it is possible that your neighbor is a direct starved * needs to impulsive.
Thus, when not busy stimulate his sausage-sized, he prefers review its ambitions in the fuck Connes-baiting his generates ...
But we all know, naive woman swallows everything.
And that's how things are going too cock.
Hence the violent impulses reproductions between neurotic sectarian , history of BI-IN c ondamner it right all future generations until 3020.
You will then see what happiness hearing is to hear them ... sexeprimer
* The death-of-hungers are recognizable at long range. Not that their gear in your direction points directly, but rather because they have a language entirely their own world of frustration, where the rule of 5 seconds is met: " suck," "Sex "" skip "," sixty-nine "," na-do-my! .
**
Unfortunately, this description tells only that some of collateral damage which you could be victim.
In all cases, a adventurous is required for this kind of adventures .
Before to put a foot, it is useful know certain soil characteristics Elsewhere Landais, if you do not want to end squashed like an old dung Cow Pets to their souls! ... that is to say ... in atroooooces suffering, haha!
The pedestrian neophyte Elsewhere Landais
You will notice pretty quickly if you have eyes operational (in this regard, I note that it is rather dangerous to drive when you're blind ) , driving on the left is an original Elsewhere Landes .
The Highway Code comes greater Law of the Jungle since there is not special rule for foot traffic ... YOUR TURN, ASSHOLE! ... S i is the imperative of not finishing crushed (ground tasks are not very aesthetic).
The lack of pedestrian crossings may, for example, suddenly become Passage death.
Especially when you're a French one, import Sino-Cambodian just autistic edges - Pardon to autism - which still have not got it, after 40 days on earth Landes Elsewhere, he had to look right! before crossing.
"It's good, right foot crushes me, I'll tell you anything. I will always be the left, right ... "
Nevertheless, pedestrian signal lights is tricolor and she deserves that you grant him any your attention.
We wanted to bring to your attention the different colors:
Warning! The colorblind should in no way reflect the following ...
The Green: This color is usually accompanied by a ringing "Biiiiip" makes pinball mom . Translation
color Green " Go ahead! Laaaaaarge yourself! . So you can cross over a quarter of a second that you is nicely set.
The Orange: This color is a color transition that follows the green and above the Red.
Translation of the color orange : " is at your own risk "
The Red: This color is in response to the orange and has the annoying tendency to monopolize the fire for at least 30 minutes.
Translation of the color red : "You'll die! "
other hand, the roads, which are also winding and prone to pot-hens , a problem of size (although that It is agreed that this is not the size that counts). Their narrow makes eminently difficult simultaneous passage of two vehicles ... (Do not worry, it's nice on collisions)
The induced shock felt (my butt still remember it ...) inevitably your sympathy for the vomit (my gut still remember it ...).
An interesting challenge however, would be ... more slalom between suicidal sheep, which were programmed to 's stop before you to inspire you to accelerate their transformation mechoui ...
**
So-Oh! You-big-microbe-French-who-enjoy them de-well-maintained roads-and-yet-to-find-anyway-the-way-of you-complaining-big-con, you return to reality quickly here: Elsewhere in Land, roads were designed for all PourRite and you drive. ..
Any contact with a human being with a Elsewhere Landais may have deplorable consequences and history will prove it.
Nevertheless, do not forget that before becoming Elsewhere Landais, these creatures were once children brand new and therefore potentially normal. but today it seems in-dis-pen-sa-ble! TESTS to operate when the Elsewhere Landais comes to pointing the tip of his nose.
***
Luckily, the physical recognition is facilitated by their hair density redhead who clearly defies all universal allowances and intergalactic (this probably explains why person of right mind wants to come and live longer in Elsewhere Land ) .
This congenital malformation , often accompanied by freckles on the skin, just as unsightly and to complement their beauty good good concealed. However, of distant legends relate that apparently, bad smells, legitimately associated with this type degeneration hair, would not effect in these countries (Yeah, I'm not convinced).
The speech recognition is a significant aspect detector of rowdy Elsewhere Landais . Indeed, them the Elsewhere Landais speak a dialect e bizarre and unintelligible called Gaelic . Know that "Aoife IS ainm dom means nothing other than " My Efa name is ". Which, admittedly, may be useful to know when we called Ifa ...
In other remote areas, located in the asshole of the world, the Elsewhere Landais, rrrrrr rrrrr-roll. But why do they do that!? you ask me! Unfortunately, this mystery remains to this day unresolved.
TFW And even being slammed all cons of ignorance.
And besides, if someone can devote themselves to buy them the book "How-issue-of-sound-and-clear-net -for-that-of- Cocks-of-French-capture-the disturbance of our lips "it would not refuse.
Another point is the spiritual recognition can also be a decisive criterion classification in the clan Elsewhere Landais . As everyone knows, the Elsewhere Landais are not very fut-fut and believe in Leprechauns . A Leprechaun is a male any old while ugly , decorated hair and beards a four-leaf clover , dressed all in green and all red . The accumulation of many deficiencies in one and the same person naturally leads to think there "dick in Couette regarding its existence ... To top it off, it would seem that more, M. The Leprechaun lives at the foot of the rainbow where it hides a pot of gold 24 carats ... (But yyyyyyy-going, take me for a ham ...). The Elsewhere Landais typical is definitely idiot.
The recognition Mental is it, relatively easy in the presence of Elsewhere Landais . Their conversations revolve around witticisms including, among other terms barbaric and savage such as "Thierry Henry" , "hand" and "cheat" (BLASPHEEEEEME aaaaaah!). Thus, a TOC which was observed in the majority of the populace Elsewhere Landes, June 22, 2010 , was his propensity to gesticulate- se-tenant-in-the-belly , followed by the issuance of guffawing to-demonic sounds. The Elsewhere Landais is a big that would have cracked finish due to the psychiatric hospital.
Otherwise, Fáilte Elsewhere Land !
***
If ever by chance, one day you hear one type of speech described or unmask One type of behavior mentioned, here's how: Change sidewalk and go your way.
... Colum II. One day, Colum He asked me to wear gloves, because he had not understood that the yellow- visible pee on my hands does not come naturally of my skin but gloves that I de-ja strung. An observation: us, ca would definitely not be possible. 
